I’ve been on vacation, seeking a different level of balance and some veg time. I read a couple of mysteries, explored some of Canada’s Eastern Townships, and then lessened the activity to increase the quiet and still time.

Filling up days with places and events is often considered a great vacation. And great it is if not for beginning and ending with exhaustion. Its restorative score could be low, as most often vacations are expected to provide a break from schedules and their pressures as experienced in daily routines. A change in place, without pace, doesn’t always leave the residual effect anticipated with a vacation.

And while a change in pace, and not place, may serve up most of the benefits sought, vacations, we should note, are personal, and preferences as such will vary. The key is balance, something we all need and seem to believe is more achievable while on vacation.

Balance can be as elusive as the universal sought after happiness. And there’s a reason: they are intertwined with our state of mind. So while a change in pace or place seem appropriate for creating balance, neither provide a guarantee for a great vacation.

When I think of vacation I’m reminded of the carefree, imaginative and fun-filled days of childhood summers. Playing was the balance I needed then, and now. From creating our Indian village to spending hours throughout the day and evening at the local pool, to climbing a rock face of one of the bluffs overlooking the Mississippi, I was free to explore, create and experience. Our play was simply accepted, with few boundaries. And the appropriate level of silliness was always balanced with equal seriousness.

Self-expression flowed, and laughter came easy and often as we were loving life. With our laughter, we were releasing plenty of those healthy endorphins, which by the way are 10 times more powerful than the pain-relieving drug morphine. And no doubt we were increasing our little hearts’ rate, as in addition to the physical activity, our endless laughter gave it a boost. FYI, just a few minutes of laughter can double your heart rate, according to Dr. William Fry, Jr.

I’ve mentioned this before, but it bears repeating: As children we laughed on average 400 times a day; by age 35 we’ve reduced that to 15. So creating a more healthy balance truly does require a bit more play and laughter, in both the mental and physical sense.

For me, there’s nothing more fun than wandering and pondering. Wandering to see and experience new things, like dark chocolate enrobed blueberries we purchased at the Saint-Benoit-du-Lac Abbey. A burst of fresh berry flavor surprised us, because it was truly fresh and truly a burst.

As for pondering, time is given to those things that just don’t make their way into my brainscape during the normal course of a week. Topic matters not because vacation offers a chance to twirl anything and everything around and peer at them from different perspectives. My mental escapades are free to involve matters of the farfetched and otherwise inconceivable.

Play, mental and physical, has been recognized as a key ingredient of well being and happiness for centuries. Aristotle and Plato spoke of such beliefs. On through history, these beliefs have gained merit through the studies of the brain pertaining to the development and education of children, problem solving, creativity, relationships at home and work, as well as team performances.

According to one study, Schaeffer 1993, play is as important to human happiness and well-being as love and work. By nature we are born to play. It’s a source of energy and excitement, stimulating our bodies and brains. At the same time it provides for calmness, relaxation and improved sleep. Vacations that incorporate play are downright therapeutic.

It has been said that you can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. I suspect the same is true in exploration of our selves. I’ve not happened upon too many down sides to play, other than the occasional skinned knee.

So with a hop and a skip, unleash yourself. Get in the spirit, stay in the spirit, be the spirit needed to jump into a fun-filled vacation. Giggle and laugh as if you’ve never grown up. Let vacation be like skinny dipping, where without hesitation you leap in. No clothes, no second thoughts are necessary as you understand life is not a dress rehearsal. Allow yourself to recapture the carefree feelings and well-being of childhood.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

He was born in 1955, raised by adoptive parents in Silicon Valley and is among the top topics Googled today. A college dropout, he was a multi-millionaire before the age of 30. He was forced out of the company he started, only to return to become CEO after his second start-up was purchased by the first. And through the sale of yet another company, he became the largest single stock holder of Disney.

The ups and downs of business were accompanied by a few in his life. He’s survived pancreatic cancer and a liver transplant. As a leader, he has as much to offer about life as he does about business. For the two are not separate in his mind.

Reports of the younger Steve Jobs would not include him in the same sentence as a reference to leadership. Seems he was autocratic and a bit cocky. On the contrary, interviews with Apple’s CEO of the last couple of years are rich in insights for happiness and success.

On the business side, focus has been critical. Jobs will tell you it is not about just saying “yes” to one thing, but rather “no” to hundred great ideas. Without discipline in focus, the resources and energy aren’t available to get out in front in a competitive market.

Jobs understands people, the right people, are key, as is delegation and decision-making. “When you hire really good people you have to give them a piece of the business and let them run with it,” he told Fortune magazine. But in doing so, he wants them to make as good or better decisions than himself, so having them up to speed on all parts of the business is crucial. There are no silos for Jobs.

But how does he decide on the right people? Competence is a given, and beyond that the “real issue” is will they fall in love with Apple. This is where life and business blend. It’s all about passion and why an applicant would want to join the team.

This is in total alignment with Jobs approach to life. “I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love, and that is as true for work as it is for your lovers,” he said.

He urges people to not settle, but rather keep looking. With work being such a large portion of life, he believes the only way to do really good work is to love what you do.

Living that belief, Jobs says he looks himself in the mirror everyday and asks: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? Whenever the answer has been ‘NO’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

What would you answer your Self in the mirror? Does passion drive you to work every morning? Or are you among those who believe you will be happier when you don’t have to work any more? Perhaps there are too many years before retirement, so you dream of winning the lottery so you can quit.

That’s exactly what one Iowa firefighter did a couple decades ago, as reported in the Des Moines newspaper. With the assurance of a check much larger than his current paycheck, he quit. He bought cars, vacationed and just lived the good life. Then, with the lottery money still coming in, he applied for his job again.

You see he missed the job and all that it meant. What he discovered was that it wasn’t just about the paycheck. Like Jobs, he really loved his job.

As he discovered, and Jobs professes, loving what you do is powerfully fulfilling. And the cliché version of the good life is not dream worthy. This is not a new notion, just a good one to revisit from time to time. French author Albert Camus summed it up rather well many, many years ago:

“Without work all life goes rotten. But when work is soulless life stifles and dies.”

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success.

            This month’s Entrepreneur magazine shares some interesting, and opposing, perspectives on engaging employees in behaviors that have positive outcomes for the business.  The cultural implications couldn’t be more disparate.

            In one article, a Midwestern credit union has banished Facebook and Twitter from the work place, and is about to forbid cell phones on the premises. Seems management’s repeated attempts to get employees to be more focused on the customer and their jobs have failed.

            It was noted that they want to trust their people to do the right thing.   But instead, have concluded “the only way we can let people know we’re serious, and really discipline hard-core offenders, is by instituting a uniform policy banning cell phones.”

            It’s not that I’m opposed to having principles by which everyone operates, but the message that is being sent by this company is just the opposite of what they say they want.  The reasoning behind the rules will breed distrust, and distance employees even more from the company.

            I have observed first hand that managing for the worst case scenario creates a culture that begins to feel like a prison.  James Autry, author of For Love and Profit, has spoken to this issue many times.  Creating policies in like manner of this credit union, is shirking management responsibilities and taking the easy way out.  Autry’s and my advice would be the same: If there are offenders, deal with them, one on one.  Do not treat everyone like an offender.

            A few pages further in the magazine we find an article that might be helpful to this credit union.  It’s titled: “Creating a culture of Excellence.”  Citing examples of what is done by 10 companies that are getting it right, Jennifer Wang says the prevailing theme is that leaders are visible and show they value each employee. And the result: an incredibly high level of trust.  

            It’s conceivable that the examples given in this one article will not be enough to convince the credit union or any company that is of like mind.  So let me recommend a quick read of The Dream Manager by Matthew Kelly. 

            It all begins with a janitorial service business that has high turnover, unhappy clients and a decreasing bottom line.  It seems to be a hopeless situation.  But there’s a happy ending, for both the company and the employees.

            The turnaround starts with some simple dialogue. The solutions came as a collaborative effort: Management asked, employees talked, management listened and together they made improvements.

            Going deeper, the management style transformed into one that, like the companies Wang lists, recognizes employees are whole people, with needs, hopes and dreams of their own.  When the work place incorporates avenues for employees to accomplish personal goals along with company goals, it becomes a magical place.

            It’s what we refer to today as engaged employees. And as Towers Watson attest, those companies with highly engaged employees out perform the others significantly.

            At the end of the day, you have to engage the hearts and minds, along with the feet and hands to have a winning work place team.

Potential can be a bit elusive.  We talk about it as if it’s easy to measure, and at other times it sounds as if it’s infinite.  “Living up to our potential” is a lifelong theme heard at home, school and the office.

But what is it?  How do you measure it?  Has anyone ever reached their full potential? All are good questions; let’s take a stab at some answers.

Behavioral scientists throughout time have agreed that, in general, we use a fraction of our potential.   They vary on the specifics, with that fractional use ranging between 5 and 25 percent.

No one seems to claim that anyone has ever demonstrated using anything close to full potential.  Einstein is purported to have said that he tapped about 10 to 12 percent of his potential.  Psychologist William James estimated that 10 percent was about what most humans use, and anthropologist Margaret Mead believed most use only 6 percent.

Does it matter if we use 6 percent or 10 percent?  What’s a few percentage points of potential really mean, anyway?  Perhaps it’s all in how it’s measured.

We are led to believe that we all have potential, though not to an equal degree.  This belief is usually based on findings about intellect and talents.

There are tests to measure IQ, but it has been repeatedly shown that IQ is not equivalent to potential.  Neuroscientists can measure the percentage of the brain used, and at the same time cite many examples of how the brain reconfigures itself, growing synapses and the possibility for more potential.

When it comes to talents, it has historically been believed that, like intellect, they are a part of the equation that determines one’s potential. Not everyone agrees.  In his book, Outliars, Malcolm Gladwell attributes much to effort and lucky opportunities.  Let’s assume we can’t do a whole lot about lucky breaks and focus on effort.

Gladwell quotes neurologist Daniel Levitin, who concludes achievement is equal to talent plus preparation. And, Levitin says, preparation plays the biggest role.

He repeatedly found, no matter what the talent, 10,000 hours of preparation was required to achieve a level of mastery or be a world class expert in anything. This was true for athletes, composers and musicians, as well as intellectual pursuits like chess playing.

To put it into the context of our discussion, the key to achievement or living up to more of our potential is directly linked to the level of our efforts, according to Levitin.

That means you can cross intellect and talents off your list of excuses. Realizing more of your potential, however it’s measured, is a matter of choosing and doing so.  

No company would survive the chaos created from a lack of leadership and a well-defined tactical mission. Free-wheeling departments operating without an eye to collaboration and coordination would only add to the confusion.  Why do we think it will work at a larger scale in the disaster recovery effort of Haiti?

            Perhaps under the auspices of the United Nations, there should be the ability to pull together the necessary expertise in a team that would lead such critical efforts to save and restore lives. Or perhaps there is a non-governmental agency that specializes in such efforts, and would be keen to the types of players needed and expertise available around the world.

            Of course, any such team would need to include expertise from the country in need to avoid the cultural missteps that come from donations that won’t work.  Offering food that can’t be eaten because it violates religious beliefs is a nice gesture, but not truly helpful.

            There is need for the dollar donations, but there is nothing like human capital with the right knowledge and skills to designate the spending.  In our ever-changing, fast-paced environment, the leadership and tactical expertise exists. It needs to be called upon and leveraged in times of catastrophe.

            There is no excuse for our world’s repeated failures to deliver swift and effective aid in such disasters. In our own country we should have learned from Katrina. Perhaps President Obama, with his audacity for hope, could step forward and offer a calm and respectful hand in setting up this team. Conferring with other world leaders on such an effort would be a good start.  Naming a member or two to the team would be a great second step.

            And while there will be those who think we don’t have time for such coordination, even fast-paced entrepreneurs will tell you that all have to be moving in the same direction on a major effort.

            I’m an optimist but I know there will be another disaster to contend with at some point.  So why not get our worldly act together, have a game plan, line up the players and the leadership.  And let the world, as John Lennon wrote, live as one… at least… and at first, in times of disaster.

            Work relationships vary in many ways.  Sometimes they are strictly business, but more often they cross over into the personal arena.  And that’s a good thing. Relationships, after all, are touted as being at the core of success.

            It’s old-fashioned to think that we cease to be people at work. That checking the heart and brains at the door stuff never really happened.  It’s not possible, thank goodness.

            Getting to know one another, not just on the surface, but in a more profound way allows for better discussions, debates and more effective decision-making.  It’s an asset no organization should be without.

            When team members are storming about an issue, it helps that they see each other  as individuals with hopes and fears, and lives beyond work.  It allows for a different level of respect and caring.  Operating day-to-day on a personal level means the business differences never go there.

            Aside from talking about the family, pets and vacations, how do team members bond, you might ask.  And that’s not a silly question.  For too long we’ve acted like people at work are somehow different than neighbors, friends and family.  And quite simply, they’re not.

            Bonding is another word for creating a connection.  People connect through shared experiences; the more powerful the experience the stronger the connection.  At work you’ll see a team pull together instantly when they face a shared crisis.  That experience will create an ongoing bond.

            The same is true if team members can let themselves be relaxed, let their guard down, and laugh together.  It’s amazing how being a little silly can let people be more comfortable with each other.  Laughing is an amazing bonding tool.

            So take a chance, let your hair down and induce a little laughter.

A business friend sent me a book last week in hopes I’d start reading it before our planned lunch this week.  The book is Secret to a Successful Life: The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson. 

There’s so many books on success and having the life you want.  And you know what, most of them say the same thing.  There is no secret.  Olson makes that clear.

In a time when we want the magic pill, the fail-proof formula or the instant solution, Olson points out what we all know to be true.  We know that, as the cliché goes, Rome was not built in a day, and nor is anyone’s life or success.

The reality is that what we do every day either contributes or detracts from our journey,  getting us closer, or taking us farther away from where we want to be.  It is one step at a time, it is one day at a time, and now is the right time.  Carpe diem! Pick the statement that speaks to you, and go with it. They’re all right on.

Life is about choices, and not always big choices.  Olson does a great job illustrating how our choices compound to create our life’s balance, as the money in our bank accounts compound interest.  If you choose to exercise today, you’ll be healthier tomorrow.  If you choose to exercise everyday, than your health will show the exponential benefit for all of your tomorrows.

And so goes the other choices, what you choose to eat or read, who you spend time with, how you spend your time… each moment counts and adds up to the total of your life. Olson recommends a holistic approach, like the one I use with clients. For it is the choices about all areas of our life being in sync that creates the balance for which we all strive.

So what choices are you making today about your greatest asset… your life?