A widow and penniless at 34, she had five small children to rear. She resorted to what she knew and supported her family through sewing and writing poetry. And while that at first may seem a path to a long, hard life for a woman in the 1800s, hers was one of rags to riches, riches in every essence of the word.

Facing life with a good amount of spunk, she penned her first novel, Northwood, just five years later. It was a huge success. That led to the position as the first editor of The Ladies Magazine. Just short of a decade later she moved to Godey’s Lady’s Book¸ where her editorial skills were credited with making it the largest publication in America, with a 150,000 subscribers by the 1850s.

She went on to author two dozen books and hundreds of poems including the nursery rhyme, Mary Had a Little Lamb. She continued to write until she was 89, just two years before her death.

She was more than a woman of words, as she was the first to advocate for equal education for girls, the first to start day nurseries for working women, and the first to push the idea of public playgrounds.

Her life and works were more than gifts of inspiration, for they changed aspects of life to this day. And yet, while another one of her greatest contributions is recognized every year at this time, hers is not a household name. She was also the “mother” of Thanksgiving.

Sarah Josepha Hale believed we had too few holidays, writing, “Thanksgiving like the Fourth of July should be considered a national festival and observed by all our people.” For four decades Hale wrote thousands of letters petitioning statesmen near and far to proclaim the holiday. In an 1859 editorial, she wrote, “If every state would join in Union Thanksgiving on the 24th of this month, would it not be a renewed pledge of love and loyalty to the Constitution of the United States?”

At last in 1863, Lincoln issued the now famous Thanksgiving Proclamation. And while the spotty history of this day started in the 1700s, and was switched to a week earlier by Roosevelt in 1939 only to be restored to the fourth Thursday and declared a national holiday by Congress in 1941, it’s a day we celebrate because of the persevering Sarah Hale.

She saw a deep need for a holiday, a day that would redirect perspectives, provide healing and strengthen the bonds of community. It would provide a spiritual dimension for dealing with the realities of the civil war, a therapy steeped in goodness and celebration.

“There is a deep moral influence in these periodical seasons of rejoicing, in which whole communities participate. They bring out… the best sympathies in our natures,” she wrote.

Hale’s beliefs were founded on intuition, but today studies show her insights on the benefits of a day for giving thanks to be so true. Psychologists Robert Emmons of the University of California-Davis and Michael McCullough of the University of Miami have shown that regular feelings of gratefulness can actually improve our emotional and physical well-being.

Emmons and McCullough’s ongoing Research Project on Gratitude and Thankfulness found that people who keep weekly gratitude journals have a better outlook on life, exercise more, experience fewer physical ailments, and make more progress on important personal goals.

Emmons, author of Gratitude, writes that gratitude is a deeper, more complex phenomenon, one that plays a critical role in happiness. It can measurably change people’s lives, he emphasizes.

“Practicing gratitude helps people extract the most out of life,” Emmons said, adding, “People can also experience an overall shift to a more benevolent view of the world. I think it’s kind of a spiritual shift for some people because it makes them more aware of life as a gift.”

When we reflect on a time when we were truly grateful, there’s a realization that the feelings, the thoughts and the energy that we experience are all encompassing. It allows no room for negativity. Fear, grief, envy, greed and sadness can’t penetrate our being. Gratitude elevates us above it all.

And so during this holiday season, count your blessings. Let this accounting take you to a new perspective and lift you up. Let it show you the truth in these words of wisdom:

“Give thanks for a little and you will find a lot.” The Hausa of Nigeria

As Sarah Hale experienced decades ago, and actor, comedian and economist Ben Stein today attests:

“I cannot tell you anything that, in a few minutes, will tell you how to be rich. But I can tell you how to feel rich, which is far better, let me tell you first hand, than being rich. Be grateful… It’s the only totally reliable get-rich, quick scheme.”
Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps CEOs and their teams develop the attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

The Chilean miners continue to be celebrated for their amazing act of survival. Earlier this month Edison Pena ran the New York marathon, finishing in just under six hours. A satisfying feat for anyone, but more so for a man who knew months of darkness. Without knowing it he was training for this race during the depths of the rescue challenge.

He had lost hope for a while, for the initial 17 days, in fact, when he said he was merely waiting to die. With a connection to the outside world came a new perspective. Life seemed a possibility again and so he began to run 6 miles a day through the dark tunnels. He said it set him free¸ allowed him to forget he was trapped under tons of rock. He had moved from surviving to thriving.

Many a blog talk about leadership lessons learned from the Chilean miners who emerged full of life after a harrowing 69 days spent under ground, unsure whether they would see the light of day again. None of the commentaries, however, tagged each and every one of the 33 men as leaders in their own right.

Just as each miner could have contributed to a disastrous outcome, so did each of them share in the survival of one another. The decisions to participate in rations, work routine and the buddy system were individual ones. No doubt the path to those decisions was as different as each of the miners, and most likely was not without struggle.

Struggle is putting it lightly. Many, like Pena, thought death was on its way. “The 33,” as they signed that first note to the world, have a pact to not discuss what happened in the first 17 days. No one needs to know the details of their weak moments, nor the battles between them. They overcame, that’s the point.

Trust and respect are inherent in their pact. They went into that mine as individuals and emerged a high-powered team, a mighty collective of individuals acting as one. They had bonded under the worst of conditions.

Miner Daniel Herrera confirmed as much. “Some of the miners only got to know each other after being trapped,” he said, adding, “Their bonds will last forever.”

Emerging as a team wasn’t accomplished by joining hands and singing “Kumbaya.” As with all high-powered teams, they did their share of storming, and probably to a much deeper and meaningful level. The value and uniqueness of the individuals were preserved, enabling a more powerful unity.

There is no greater team test than survival with extreme odds. And you can get no more efficient than extending a two-day food supply to 17 days. All were engaged, all had existence at stake. Whether contributing charismatic influence, nursing knowledge, technical skills or practical ideas, all the miners brought something to the task of survival.
All brought value to the team.

The job of a leader is simply to get the desired results. The job of a team is to leverage the assets of the individuals to fulfill a common purpose. The 33 miners did both. Leading themselves, their behavior was conducive to accomplishing survival. Leveraging strengths among the miners, they managed resources and workload for a successful rescue.

“When we found them after 17 days, we found them in good condition because they were able to organize themselves. They managed to not eat all the food, and in a peaceful way,” noted Auturo Fermandois, Chilean ambassador to the United States.

The miners taught us that impossibility isn’t what it seems. We give up so easily in everyday business. Perhaps it’s because we don’t have as much at stake. And maybe it’s because we don’t allow for everyone to be a leader in their own right and contribute to their optimal level.

Truly believing that everyone counts, that every single employee brings value will change your business approach. And it will change your outcomes. The Towers Watson global surveys put real, bottom line numbers to this difference. Enabling employee engagement to the same level that resulted in the miners’ survival, will result in brighter days for your business.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps CEOS and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

I asked a group of professionals recently about how often they worried. It was no surprise when they indicated it was a regular part of life for them, as was stress. And when asked what great achievements have come from this ongoing commitment to such practices, there was silence.

There were no benefits, rather just the opposite was true. Not only did their worry consume precious time and energy, it literally was sucking some of the life right out of them. It was creating an ongoing state of stress.

As one would guess, these professionals acknowledged without hesitation that they could give themselves a headache if I requested them to do so. Unfortunately when I asked them if they could also rid themselves of a headache, the response was not as quick, confident nor positive.

We’ve all heard that stress is a killer, and so it is, though usually a slow and agonizing one. Biology basics make this clear, in addition to showing how the elimination of stress will not make for a vital life or one of greater well-being. For the absence of stress only gets us to point neutral on the scale of well-being.

Dr. Bruce Lipton, biologist and author of Biology of Belief, explains why. Our body performs two basic functions for survival: growth and protection. Growth involves the replacement of billions of cells everyday. Protection mode sounds the alarm to threats, like stress, activating chemical responses and redirecting energy.

The catch to these basic functions is that the body cannot perform them both simultaneously to an optimal level. That means something’s got to give. And that something is your growth, your maintenance. Threats to our system take priority, leaving us to slowly wear out.

Reality is that we live in a world where we allow stressful situations to be prevalent. Lipton describes this existence as one in the “Get Set” mode. “Our hyper-vigilant lifestyle keeps our body primed for action,” he says, much like that of a runner on the starting line.

When runners are in “Get Set” mode, their bodies release adrenaline that powers their muscles for the race ahead. While waiting for the “Go” signal, the body strains in anticipation. That strain lasts only seconds on the starting line, but if it were prolonged, Lipton explains, the runners would physically collapse within a minute despite their conditioning and toned muscles.

So why do we do this to ourselves? At the root of stress and worry is fear. Much of fear, if we are honest, is what my colleagues and I refer to as False Evidence Appearing Real. It resides in our reflexive subconscious mind, driving our behavior without reason. In other words, our subconscious doesn’t distinguish between a real threat and a false one.

I’ll admit it, I’m afraid of snakes. The level of stress they cause me is something you don’t want to experience. However, intellectually I know that not everyone is afraid of snakes. Some people have them as pets, play with them and wrap them around their bodies. There aren’t a lot of poisonous snakes in Vermont, so my fears are pretty much unfounded.

If you could take a few steps back, truly distance yourself from a worrisome situation, a similar realization might emerge. And at the very least, you, like our professionals mentioned previously, would have to admit conjuring up worry and stress contribute nothing to the desired outcome. Quite the contrary, it’s a waste of your very being, your lifetime.

It’s not an easy habit to break, for we are so good at allowing stress to take over our lives. Even if we did a total life transformation, creating whatever we believe to be the ideal existence and removing all the current sources of stress, we’d find new ones. It’s a mindset we’ve adopted.

The fact is, as so many of my blogs conclude, stress is as much a matter of choice as is our lifestyle. Earl Nightingale so succinctly captures the essence of this choice:

“Like a garden, so grows the mind. It will grow what ever you plant. We are what we think.”

No matter the situation, you can choose to think differently, and in so doing reduce stress. You know this intuitively. Take the next step and practice it.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps CEOs and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

The concept of ego is tossed around quite a bit these days and deserves a bit of exploration. Many current day philosophers and authors present ego as a bad element, being something that interferes with goodness.

These modern day thinkers therefore conclude that the ideal state is one defined by the absence of ego. Ego is often related to self-centeredness and selfishness, both of which also have negative connotations. These states of being are not one in the same and should not be confused.

In order to have a shared exploration, let’s look at how and why one’s ego develops. To gain a good understanding, it will be helpful to return to the day our birth, for that is the beginning of our development in this earthly existence. It will serve us well to reacquaint ourselves with the early years of our journey.

I have previously referenced what happens from day one, the moment we emerge from the womb. We come into this world as clean, little slates, so to speak. Our existence is one without choice about what we see, hear, smell, touch or taste. Without a sophisticated way to communicate, our lives are controlled by our caretakers. In most cases, our parents assume this role.

The extent of our capacity is to respond or react to that which we are exposed. And those reactions are greeted with approval, discouragement, or in some cases, are completely ignored.

It’s important to remember that as we grow in those first years of life, behavioral scientists have calculated that 80 percent of what we experience is negative. There are a lot of “nos,” “don’ts” and “don’ts” with consequences.

We repeatedly hear statements that discourage too much curiosity, exploration and ventures beyond easily monitored and safe surroundings as determined by our parents.

Think about having your thoughts, ideas and sense of fun met with constant road blocks. It continues to happen in adulthood, both among family and friends, as well as at work. New ideas and new paths are most often met with skepticism and comments about all the things that could go wrong.

A natural reaction to such nay saying would be defensiveness. If you believe in your idea or plan, it would seem automatic to make a case for its soundness. Enter in ego, the believer of Self.

Ego begins a transformation into a defensive mechanism to overcome all the negativity we are inundated with in our everyday existence. It begins to serve as a protector of Self. And considering the amount of negativity, it is easy to see how the ego can become overdeveloped.

In the repeated act of countering negativity, an environment of competition and score-keeping is grown. There is an overemphasis and necessity for right vs. wrong, and an either/or perspective. A spirit of one-upmanship manifests, creating a circular pattern, or ongoing domino effect of disapproval and discouragement sparking a defensive posture.

It’s a rather uninviting and miserable scenario. Thus our philosophers make their case for throwing out ego all together without discerning at what level ego is bad. This in turn instills guilt, contributes to the world of negativity, and in essence, becomes part of developing the ego to an extreme.

Perhaps we can easily acknowledge and agree that an overextended ego is not good. That, however, does not translate into the extinction of ego being the pathway to universal nirvana. Swinging the pendulum from one extreme to the next does not get us to an ideal state, but rather a new version of extension, which in this case is an under extension.

In all things, balance is the ideal state. Life is about balance. When everything about our existence is in a state of equilibrium, we are at peace, happy and productive. That includes our ego. Balancing our individual well-being and existence with that of others makes way for a healthy ego. There is no need for proving rightness.

Behavior resulting from an attempt to rid oneself of ego often appears as martyrdom, self-sacrifice, a holier-than-thou savior or just the opposite, no self-esteem. At the root of all of these behaviors is little or no self-worth. One no longer values or loves Self.

Equalizing your ego makes you just as important, not more or less, as everyone else. Everyone is of equal value. There is appreciation for one and all, as the connectivity and viral impact between all is clearly seen.

This allows one to take in others’ differing, even negative, perspectives, extract what value they offer and then move on. It’s movement forward not in spite of, but despite others’ thoughts. It allows one to be true to oneself.

Let me end with some words of wisdom from others. They just might help you put your ego in perspective.

“The minute you begin to do what you really want to do, it’s really a different kind of life.” – Buckminster Fuller

“It is up to you to illuminate the world.” – Phillippe Venier

“We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worst that has been done to us. – Edward Lewis

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop habits and attitudes for ongoing success and happiness.

Ever been told there are some things you just can’t do because of physical limitations? You know, that you should be realistic because the people that are successful in particular field all have certain physical attributes. Maybe you are too short to be a basketball player, or maybe sports of any sort just aren’t for you because you’re blind.

You can believe such things if you want. I’d rather not. There are some amazing people in this world that show us that we can pretty much do what we set our minds to do, despite the perception of limitations by others.

One of the starters on our high school basketball team was about half the height of the other players. Short, indeed, he was. All the other players literally towered over him. So how the heck could he be a starter?

Instead of seeing his shortness as a hindrance to be overcome, he saw it as advantage to be used. He was quick, and though he couldn’t quite fit through their legs, he could whiz around his opponents, dribbling all the way.
His dribbles were so low that those tall guys became a little awkward when they attempted to steal the ball. With basketball being a team sport, our starter would get the ball to his mates to compete at the higher levels.

Ever heard of Mike May? He was just a typical little boy until a garage explosion left him blind and needing 500 stitches. Nonetheless, he’s seen plenty of victory.

His mother insisted he go to a regular school, when that was not usually allowed. And she let him do anything other boys his age were doing. He rode a bike, and when he crashed it, he asked if he could ride his sister’s. The May garage eventually became home to four mangled bikes.

His mother set aside her protective instincts and told Mike that all kids fall down when trying new things. And so it should come as no surprise to learn that Mike also played flag football, soccer and baseball.
That continues to be the spirit with which Mike chooses to live his life. After Mike set a record in downhill skiing, a reporter asked his mother how she had raised her blind boy. She replied, “What blind boy, I raised my son.”

Mike is also a sky diver, lecturer, guitarist, and was the first blind CIA analyst. There’s more to his story, including how he regained some of his sight. It’s all in his inspirational book titled, Crashing Through.
If we look in earnest, we can probably find an example of someone overcoming just about any physical limitation to achieve what others thought they could not. And while that takes determination when from birth you are without all abilities, it takes a special will to move on when physical capabilities you’ve enjoyed are taken away midlife.

A child prodigy, Leon Fleischer made his public debut on piano at the age of 8 after four years of training. He continued on to have an amazing career until one day he noticed that the fourth and fifth fingers on his right hand were curling up toward his palm. The condition, called focal dystonia, worsened until all the fingers on that hand were curled into his palm. He was 36.

The piano and performing were Fleisher’s life, literally since the time he was a tot. So how could this world renowned pianist continue without the use of one of his hands? Quite simply, he played concertos created for the left hand. And after some years and various treatments he was able to play two-handed again.

Inspiration comes from those who dare to do what others think impossible. They make the rest of us think twice about our excuses and so called limitations. Perhaps they understand what Kierkegaard proclaimed so long ago:

“To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself.”

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

I’ve been on vacation, seeking a different level of balance and some veg time. I read a couple of mysteries, explored some of Canada’s Eastern Townships, and then lessened the activity to increase the quiet and still time.

Filling up days with places and events is often considered a great vacation. And great it is if not for beginning and ending with exhaustion. Its restorative score could be low, as most often vacations are expected to provide a break from schedules and their pressures as experienced in daily routines. A change in place, without pace, doesn’t always leave the residual effect anticipated with a vacation.

And while a change in pace, and not place, may serve up most of the benefits sought, vacations, we should note, are personal, and preferences as such will vary. The key is balance, something we all need and seem to believe is more achievable while on vacation.

Balance can be as elusive as the universal sought after happiness. And there’s a reason: they are intertwined with our state of mind. So while a change in pace or place seem appropriate for creating balance, neither provide a guarantee for a great vacation.

When I think of vacation I’m reminded of the carefree, imaginative and fun-filled days of childhood summers. Playing was the balance I needed then, and now. From creating our Indian village to spending hours throughout the day and evening at the local pool, to climbing a rock face of one of the bluffs overlooking the Mississippi, I was free to explore, create and experience. Our play was simply accepted, with few boundaries. And the appropriate level of silliness was always balanced with equal seriousness.

Self-expression flowed, and laughter came easy and often as we were loving life. With our laughter, we were releasing plenty of those healthy endorphins, which by the way are 10 times more powerful than the pain-relieving drug morphine. And no doubt we were increasing our little hearts’ rate, as in addition to the physical activity, our endless laughter gave it a boost. FYI, just a few minutes of laughter can double your heart rate, according to Dr. William Fry, Jr.

I’ve mentioned this before, but it bears repeating: As children we laughed on average 400 times a day; by age 35 we’ve reduced that to 15. So creating a more healthy balance truly does require a bit more play and laughter, in both the mental and physical sense.

For me, there’s nothing more fun than wandering and pondering. Wandering to see and experience new things, like dark chocolate enrobed blueberries we purchased at the Saint-Benoit-du-Lac Abbey. A burst of fresh berry flavor surprised us, because it was truly fresh and truly a burst.

As for pondering, time is given to those things that just don’t make their way into my brainscape during the normal course of a week. Topic matters not because vacation offers a chance to twirl anything and everything around and peer at them from different perspectives. My mental escapades are free to involve matters of the farfetched and otherwise inconceivable.

Play, mental and physical, has been recognized as a key ingredient of well being and happiness for centuries. Aristotle and Plato spoke of such beliefs. On through history, these beliefs have gained merit through the studies of the brain pertaining to the development and education of children, problem solving, creativity, relationships at home and work, as well as team performances.

According to one study, Schaeffer 1993, play is as important to human happiness and well-being as love and work. By nature we are born to play. It’s a source of energy and excitement, stimulating our bodies and brains. At the same time it provides for calmness, relaxation and improved sleep. Vacations that incorporate play are downright therapeutic.

It has been said that you can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. I suspect the same is true in exploration of our selves. I’ve not happened upon too many down sides to play, other than the occasional skinned knee.

So with a hop and a skip, unleash yourself. Get in the spirit, stay in the spirit, be the spirit needed to jump into a fun-filled vacation. Giggle and laugh as if you’ve never grown up. Let vacation be like skinny dipping, where without hesitation you leap in. No clothes, no second thoughts are necessary as you understand life is not a dress rehearsal. Allow yourself to recapture the carefree feelings and well-being of childhood.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success and happiness.

Last week I wrote about how insightful nighttime dreams can be, and it got me to thinking about the benefits of daydreams. The fact is, dreaming is part of everything I do with clients, whether planning for business or life.

But you know, I’ve found we’re not very good at it. Somewhere along the way from childhood to adulthood, dreaming is given less and less time to the point of not even being considered a valid use of our attention. Frivolous, going no where, waste of time, not possible… you name it, dreaming gets tossed into a mental circular with one of these tags.

Sometimes, for those who are lucky, life proves us wrong. One day, a client was excited to share with me that she was going to a ball in Paris. She said she had always dreamed of doing so. A frequent international traveler, speaker and author, it didn’t seem out of the realm of possibility.

However, when I asked her if going to a Paris ball appeared on her Dream Inventory, she said no, looking a bit puzzled. She added, I didn’t think it would ever happen. Then she realized that she, like so many others, without thinking had been qualifying and limiting her dreams.

Other times, for those who dare to dream and believe, they prove life wrong. Concerted efforts are great at producing a twist of fates. In a business where it is said “most don’t make it the list of actors and actresses that dared to dream is extensive. Johnny Depp, Sandra Bullock and Courtney Cox among others have shared their propensity to dream and its impact on drive and achievement.

Canada’s Globe and Mail newspaper celebrates the Top 40 under 40, business people who realize their dreams in the first three decades of life. Among the winners’ reasoning for success, you will find reference to dreams.

William Andrew of Ontario says he dares to dream; Rob Dynan says “anything is possible”; and Olga Kovalchuk says to “think positive, dream big.”

The strength of belief was most evident in comments by David Henderson, a 37-year-old also from Ontario: “I believe success involves waking up everyday to relentlessly, rigorously and passionately pursue your dreams of a better world.”

There are so many testimonials that dreaming is part of the formula for success and happiness. Whether a rags to riches story, or a conquering of physical disabilities, or an “I’ll show them” attitude in response to put downs and negative feedback, there seems to be endless proof that dreaming and believing are first steps in great achievements.

Still it is not a practice or belief of the majority. Most want to believe, but somehow never grasp it in an intentional way. I suppose they are more inclined to grip on to an age-old obstacle, that being fear.

Yanni would agree. When releasing his eighth album, titled “Dare to Dream,” back in the ‘90s he said it came “from a realization that not only don’t people go after their dreams, they often are afraid to dream at all.”

Life comes with no guarantee, not an external one anyway. Within, each one of us has access to the only guarantee we need, belief in self and our dreams. A high school entrepreneur, having launched several start-ups and making her first million by graduation, cited belief in self, including one’s dreams, as the No. 1 ingredient for success.

The net is rich with stories and advice on dreaming and achieving. With a few clicks you can immerse yourself in inspiration and all you need to get on with dreaming. As a bit of encouragement, I’ll leave you with a short poem by Julie Anne Ford:

Dare to dream

Simply said, it’s the straightforward truth. So, dare to dream and tap into life’s guarantee.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success.

Seems we never have enough time. Those who have all they desire are few and far between. The rest tend to eliminate the fun, settle for less, or burn the candle at both ends. None are great options. However, there is another way.

First, I must say I truly believe in and love a good night’s sleep. There’s nothing like waking in the morning totally relaxed, with your muscles feeling like half melted marshmallows, free of all tension. Your mind meanders back, peeking a bit at the world and then retreating. Slowly and comfortably, you unite with the new day.

Nonetheless, the night offers us another way to overcome some of our greatest obstacles of the day. Don’t jump to conclusions, you still get to sleep as much as ever. You see at night when the conscious mind shuts off, the subconscious stays on duty. In fact, it never takes time off. It is our autopilot, doing its work at all hours, everyday.

Still skeptical? Let me share some history and a bit of firsthand experience. We’re all familiar with the sewing machine, but perhaps not how it came to be in 1845. Its inventor, Elias Howe got stuck on how to make the needle work. In hand sewing, the needle is pointed at one end and has an “eye” at the other to carry the thread. That did not work on the machine, and neither did moving the “eye” to the middle of the needle.

Then one night, after puzzling all day on this, the right design came to him in a dream. It was an odd dream, one that had natives poking him with pointy spears that had holes near the point. And so he awoke with the answer that still works today.

Ever heard of the German scientist Friedrich August Kekule von Stradonitz? Yes, he’s another dreamer who contributed Structural Theory and the Benzene molecule to the world of organic chemistry. Here’s what happened in his words:

“… I was sitting writing on my textbook, but the work did not progress; my thoughts were elsewhere. I turned my chair to the fire and dozed. Again the atoms were gamboling before my eyes. …long rows sometimes more closely fitted together all twining and twisting in snake-like motion. But look! What was that? One of the snakes had seized hold of its own tail…”

These stories may seem farfetched and so long ago. So travel closer in time to today, for there are people who understand and make use of their subconscious during slumber. I am one of them. I remember, when in high school, working on an algebra problem all weekend long to no avail. What can I say, I loved math. Then, as with our inventor and scientist, the answer just came to me in my sleep. No amazing dreams, just the answer.

Later, when working as a Features Editor, we did a story on just this topic. And we discovered it doesn’t require waiting for nighttime shut eye. A TV repairman just took a nap any time he was stumped, and voila, he awoke with the solution.

So how does it work? Research at the University of California, San Diego School of Medicine, spearheaded by a leading expert on the positive benefits of napping, gives us a clue. Sara Mednick, PhD, assistant professor of psychiatry at UC San Diego and the VA San Diego Healthcare System, reported that REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, which is rich in dreams, stimulates associative networks, allowing the brain to make new and useful associations between unrelated items.

“Fluid interpretation is a hallmark of a creative mind, from idle word play to the abstraction of shapes that led to the solving of neurochemical transmission or structure of the benzene ring,” wrote the research team in their findings. They go on to support the experience of our scientific dreamer. “These findings on the role of REM sleep in creative problem solving underscore the Nobel Laureate Friedrich A. Kekule’s recommendation: ‘Let us learn to dream.’”

The key was to prime the brain before sleep. In doing so, many have a hard time shutting off the conscious mind, which, in addition to being incapable of the same cognitive level as the subconscious, runs interference. REM sleep is the key, allowing the subconscious to do its magical connections without distraction. In a way, it’s a form of multi-tasking, a seemingly effortless one.

Most of us will still need to make the most of our days. And that, quite frankly, will take some conscious time management. But, as our friend of a couple of blogs ago, Thomas Edison, would say, “Never go to sleep without a request to your subconscious.”

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success.

It was a blustery, winter day, much like those we are all too familiar with in Vermont. But no one was cold, even though they were all outside. I suppose they were hot with excitement, or perhaps fear.

You could hear a father yelling to his son, “Go get your mother, she’ll never have another chance to see anything like this.”

The day was December 9, 1914. The man was the owner of the largest laboratory in the world. His name is a familiar one: Thomas Edison. At age 67, he was watching his research complex go up in flames. All but a few buildings of the Edison Industries burned to the ground that day.

The losses exceeded $2 million. He had some insurance; less than $300 worth though. The building was made of concrete and in those days it was believed fire could not destroy such a structure. That belief couldn’t have been more wrong.

So how do you think our “light up the world” guy reacted? Remember he’s 67; he’d stuck it out through thousands and thousands of attempts (or some might say, mistakes) to succeed in developing the light bulb. How would you react if you showed up at work to find the place lost to fire? Imagine what would be happening in the next few days… the next weeks.

Edison didn’t waste much time wallowing in his sorrow. Nor did he let the expense of his losses drown him in pity or despair. No, it was quite a different reaction.

The next morning he returned to where his life’s work had been housed. While the fire had been brought under control through the night, all that remained were a couple of buildings and smoldering rubble. Edison stood there, looking over his losses. We don’t need to guess what his thoughts were, for he proclaimed:

“There is great value in disaster. All our mistakes are burned up. Thank God we can start anew.”

And start anew he and his team did, as if there was no time to waste. In just three weeks, Edison Industries introduced the world to a new and better phonograph.

Edison could have been a best selling author with a book on how to move beyond disaster. An appropriate title could’ve been: Don’t Sweat the Big Stuff.

Pretty much, Edison lived his life that way. He didn’t get more squeamish or weak-kneed as he aged. So often, we seem to tire of dealing with even the smaller, everyday adversities as our years accumulate. Not Edison, he kept a strong, youthful and atypical ambitious attitude

His perspectives were not the norm. For example, he never claimed to be an inventor despite his more than one thousand patents. Once when the governor of North Carolina complimented him on his inventiveness, he declared he was not a great inventor. His only claim to an original invention was the phonograph.

He explained all the ideas were not original to him. Instead he referred to himself as a sponge, soaking up ideas any where he could. Those with whom the ideas originated just never developed them. So he’d take them, do a little tweaking and improve them to a point of having value.

How is it that Edison worked his way through about 10,000 attempts to create the light bulb? How many goals have you ever pursued with such persistence? How about your company?

How could he move so many ideas to fruition when those with the actual concept took them no where? How many times have you or a friend had an idea only to see someone else develop it?

Why is it there are a few like Edison who don’t let even the big stuff get in their way, and then there is the majority, who often let even the little stuff stop them?

It’s time for the heart to heart, a look inside, some deep reflection. Can you honestly say you have a habit of pulling yourself up, getting on with life and business no matter the circumstances?

I can hear the excuses now. There’s always a reason why the other guy or gal can move on, but you can’t. There was something special about Edison’s situation, you’re so sure. There’s a piece of the story missing, some advantage or benefit that wasn’t mentioned.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. No special circumstance in this case, just a special person. Edison just didn’t believe in stopping. He didn’t see failure and disaster in the same way as others. Perhaps he didn’t see them at all.

So let’s cop ourselves an Edison attitude, and never acknowledge obstacles in the average way again. Let’s commit to not sweating the big stuff, and moving on.

Anita Ancel is President of Ancelary Group, a Vermont firm that helps executives and their teams develop attitudes and habits for ongoing success.

You can often hear the assumptions being made if you listen for them in a conversation. Sometimes it’s a comment that will give it away, other times it is the lack of one. Either way, assumptions tell about the people making them.

These conclusions, made in the absence of knowledge, might be made at the conscious level, but frequently are driven by some kind of subconscious belief and can involve being judgmental. This does not imply, however, that there is any ill intent.

When facilitating communication sessions on this topic, I often start off by tripping into the room. A little later, I’ll ask participants if they checked to see what I tripped on or just assumed that I was a klutz. Klutz it is.

We all make assumptions, but we may not always be aware of it, or why we do so. A great illustration of this is the last jury scene from “Twelve Angry Men,” a 1957 movie starring Henry Fonda.

By the last scene there are three guilty votes, down from 11 jurors believing a boy stabbed his father to death. It is 6:15 in the evening and some want to declare a hung jury. Tempers are all too evident. They decide to go through the evidence one more time.

The last holdout switches his vote after a photo of he and his son falls out of his wallet. He loses it, saying something about rotten kids. He, along with all the other jurors, now understands the bias that was driving his perspective.

You’ve probably run into such prejudices. I have. I’m not a car person, but there is one car that I’ve always liked, an Audi TT. I have one. It’s a 2001, silver with the classic lines that are lost on today’s models. It’s a fun car to drive and gets about 33 miles to the gallon. Oh, and I bought it used, as part of my recycling philosophy.

Friends or not, the typical assumption is that I am rich and this is an expensive car. Well, it was cheaper than the used Subaru Outback that I used to drive when I had kids to chauffer. And it was cheaper than most of the cars these assumers buy.

My husband works with some engineers who had a similar experience. They bought an old, inexpensive Jaguar. After losing too many jobs to assumptions that they would be too expensive or were making too much money, they got rid of it.

Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with buying a new, expensive car. I don’t assume that people who do are greedy, uncaring or self-centered. But sadly, I’ve heard such assumptions.

Sometimes people just can’t help themselves. As was the case with one friend, who, after I quit my job commented, “You must of gotten one heck of a package.” I realized quitting such a job just wasn’t in his realm of possibility.

Another friend said I was able to quit because I had a husband to support me. I kindly told her it wasn’t the first time I had quit a high paying job. The first time I was a single mother with two children still at home.

Remember our subconscious often plays a part in assumptions, while we remain unaware. You can test this for yourself, if you’d like. I’d suggest you try Race Implicit Association Test or IAT at www.implicit.harvard.edu. It measures your subconscious attitudes toward blacks and whites.

Know that you probably have conscious attitudes that will differ from, contradict even, those that show up on the IAT test. Most do. Harvard’s Mahzarin Banaji says if you’ve lived in North America long, you’ve been inundated with images and information that link whites with good things, and will accordingly create a subconscious bias.

You know, you can’t go wrong with making one assumption. I’ll bet you know what it is.