You can often hear the assumptions being made if you listen for them in a conversation. Sometimes it’s a comment that will give it away, other times it is the lack of one. Either way, assumptions tell about the people making them.

These conclusions, made in the absence of knowledge, might be made at the conscious level, but frequently are driven by some kind of subconscious belief and can involve being judgmental. This does not imply, however, that there is any ill intent.

When facilitating communication sessions on this topic, I often start off by tripping into the room. A little later, I’ll ask participants if they checked to see what I tripped on or just assumed that I was a klutz. Klutz it is.

We all make assumptions, but we may not always be aware of it, or why we do so. A great illustration of this is the last jury scene from “Twelve Angry Men,” a 1957 movie starring Henry Fonda.

By the last scene there are three guilty votes, down from 11 jurors believing a boy stabbed his father to death. It is 6:15 in the evening and some want to declare a hung jury. Tempers are all too evident. They decide to go through the evidence one more time.

The last holdout switches his vote after a photo of he and his son falls out of his wallet. He loses it, saying something about rotten kids. He, along with all the other jurors, now understands the bias that was driving his perspective.

You’ve probably run into such prejudices. I have. I’m not a car person, but there is one car that I’ve always liked, an Audi TT. I have one. It’s a 2001, silver with the classic lines that are lost on today’s models. It’s a fun car to drive and gets about 33 miles to the gallon. Oh, and I bought it used, as part of my recycling philosophy.

Friends or not, the typical assumption is that I am rich and this is an expensive car. Well, it was cheaper than the used Subaru Outback that I used to drive when I had kids to chauffer. And it was cheaper than most of the cars these assumers buy.

My husband works with some engineers who had a similar experience. They bought an old, inexpensive Jaguar. After losing too many jobs to assumptions that they would be too expensive or were making too much money, they got rid of it.

Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with buying a new, expensive car. I don’t assume that people who do are greedy, uncaring or self-centered. But sadly, I’ve heard such assumptions.

Sometimes people just can’t help themselves. As was the case with one friend, who, after I quit my job commented, “You must of gotten one heck of a package.” I realized quitting such a job just wasn’t in his realm of possibility.

Another friend said I was able to quit because I had a husband to support me. I kindly told her it wasn’t the first time I had quit a high paying job. The first time I was a single mother with two children still at home.

Remember our subconscious often plays a part in assumptions, while we remain unaware. You can test this for yourself, if you’d like. I’d suggest you try Race Implicit Association Test or IAT at www.implicit.harvard.edu. It measures your subconscious attitudes toward blacks and whites.

Know that you probably have conscious attitudes that will differ from, contradict even, those that show up on the IAT test. Most do. Harvard’s Mahzarin Banaji says if you’ve lived in North America long, you’ve been inundated with images and information that link whites with good things, and will accordingly create a subconscious bias.

You know, you can’t go wrong with making one assumption. I’ll bet you know what it is.

In January, I sent out cards to current and past clients, encouraging them to see the opportunities beyond the obstacles. The possibilities, numerous and varied, are there if we choose to look.

Obstacles are most often tagged as matters that hinder or create difficulties. Interfering and interrupting, they are seen as a nuisance. Sometimes it’s nothing serious, just an annoyance to be shooed away as if it were a bothersome fly. That’s the glass half-full perspective.

Half-empty looks different. It’s worse. Obstacles become monstrous. They’re our deepest fears, come to stare us in the face of our weakest vulnerabilities. They penetrate our resolve. And we, we succumb.

Now, if we tilt our heads a bit and cock our attitudes we’ll realize there’s yet another perspective. What if we didn’t dread obstacles, rather we marveled in what they offered. Clearly they communicate if we stay the current course without some adjustment, we’re doomed. So why not welcome their lead.

These kinds of shifts are happening all the time; think about it. Experienced, white guys have been joined at the top of corporate ladders by the young, the female, the ethnic, the non-conformist and the globally-connected.

Commuting to the office to talk to others on the phone is frowned upon as not green. No office and virtual workers are more common place.

The mobile phone is replacing PCs as the main connection to the internet, among other uses. Half the Top 10 best selling novels in Japan were written on mobile phones.

The old adage of never give anything away for free has given way to a global free-for-all. Open source, shared templates along with co-creating have been embraced as lucrative business models. Even IBM came around to participating in open source software.

At the root of all of these shifts is a different view. Someone either didn’t see, or saw past and through, the rules, limitations and problems. From their perspective rose the alternatives and some new directions.

Traveling these new paths, the point of departure is often forgotten. The focus is ahead. The unexpected, the once unknown, and the never-before-imagined are along the way. Arrival is in a new place, until, again, seeing goes beyond.

From this vantage point, I’d say, obstacles are among our new, best friends.

I found myself somewhat immersed in the world of visual art this past week. From looking at my son’s latest creation, to watching a movie about Georgia O’Keeffe and having dinner with a friend who is celebrating his 50th year as an artist, I took a fresh look at the world and contemplated life.

The three styles of painting are distinctively identifiable with each artist. The canvasses speak to the essence of their creator, hinting at their values, as well as bits and pieces of their life’s journey. But most pronounced in the work are the artists’ passions, undeniable and, for the most part, unwavering.

While my son is just beginning, the stories of the other two reinforce this sense of passion, including a passion for the unique self. O’Keeffe had at one point early on given up on her art, noting that the tradition of what she had learned was not one with which she could distinguish herself. Then, while attending a teaching college, she met Arthur Dow, who believed the goal of art is the expression of the artist’s personal ideas and feelings.

O’Keeffe says Dow “…helped me find something of my own.” It was from within that O’Keeffe found the connection between herself and the land, transferring it to canvas for all to see. And from that point on the world was enriched with her shared intimacy of our landscapes.

In “finding her own,” came a strength and freedom to stay the course. She is quoted, “I get out my work and have a show for myself before I have it publicly. I make up my own mind about it – how good or bad or indifferent it is. After that the critics can write what they please. I have already settled it for myself so flattery and criticism go down the same drain and I am quite free.”

The same is true for my friend, Paul Gruhler, who finds that his modernist abstract works are not always enthusiastically welcomed. And yet, freely he continues, and in doing so his art reveals a strong voice, full of colorful subtleties and an undeniable integrity.

He does not go unnoticed or unappreciated. A January exhibition in New Hampshire proved to be a very confirming and lucrative one, as about a dozen of his paintings sold. His work is currently on exhibit at the governor’s office here in Vermont, and has been a constant in another state official’s office for some time.

Gruhler grew up in New York “in awe of the tall buildings and the orderly grid of streets and avenues.” Combined with an equal wondering reverence for the art of Sung and later Chinese dynasties, he creates both harmony and tension through a sophisticated use of the basics: color, line and form.

He creates with a respect for the individual in all of us. Thus, he doesn’t title his works because he wants “above all to leave them available to the experience and discovery of others.”

This passion, this relentless commitment to share the best of who they are, is a wonderful display of leadership. For at the core of great leadership is authenticity, which can only begin with self.

That’s not the only lesson here, though. Key to survival in the art and business worlds, alike, is something upon which many a strategic planning sessions have focused. That is, the unique value proposition.

If artists can take the same tools and palette of colors, and present the everyday in a way that is recognizably of them, a business likewise can present its products or services in a way that sets them a part. Like so many things in life, these distinctions come from taking a deep look within, as opposed to solely keeping a watchful eye on the outer world.

A few weeks ago I likened a business environment heavy with policy to the culture of a prison. My point was that managing for the worst case employee makes everyone an offender, disengaging them and costing the bottom line.

Let me be the first to say, “Shame on me,” for I was acting as if all prisons are awful places. I stand corrected. There are lessons to be learned from what is tagged as the most humane prison in the world. Located in Norway, Halden Fengsel is featured in this week’s Time magazine.

Before you dismiss me as a nut case, read just a bit further. Let’s treat this as a business case study, relating it to motivating and engaging employees. We’ll judge success on bottom line results as they relate to the vision, mission and core values.

For fairness sake, we need to admit upfront that motivating murderers, rapists and drug dealers to align with the prison’s goals is a bit more of a challenge than getting qualified employees to do likewise for a business. While prisoners are more of a captive audience, their attitudes are generally not conducive to collaboration. And we all know the difference a bad attitude can make.

A prison’s short term goal is to separate criminals from the rest of society. The longer term mission is to rehab criminals, helping them to become contributing citizens instead of repeat offenders. The vision, therefore, is to create a safer world, reducing crime and its overall cost to society.

Halden succeeds on all fronts, especially when compared to the United States. After two years, Time reports, Norway’s recidivism rate is 20 percent, compared to 50 to 60 percent in our country. And there are fewer criminals: 69 per 100,000 people in Norway, to 759 in the U.S.

The spread in these prison success rates can be likened to those established between businesses with the most and least engaged employees. To state the obvious, it’s significant. And in both situations success can be linked directly to the valuing and treatment of individuals.

The Towers Watson 2010 Global Workforce Study, involving 20,000 employees in 22 markets, concludes just that. For businesses to experience optimum results, according to the study, they will need to “create a more personalized work experience and foster self reliance by enabling employees to build their skills, plan for their financial future and live healthy lives…”

In this workforce study as well as the previous one, the relationship between leadership and employees is tagged as being critical. Trust, respect and appreciation for employees are among the gauges that have been correlated with business growth.

Back at the Norway prison, we learn that Halden’s greatest asset may be the relationship between the managing staff and inmates. Instead of carrying guns, guards share meals and engage in sports with those serving sentences.

Referring to them as pupils, the goal is to give inmates “a meaningful life inside these walls.” Through education and work, the intent is to “build them up (and) give them confidence.”

The culture is one of family, and the environment one that could easily be referred to as “home, sweet, home” With long windows to let sunlight in, flat screen TVs, mini fridges and shared kitchens and living rooms, inmates are given comforts unlike most of their real homes.

And not unlike business climate studies, Halden surveys inmates to find out how the prison experience can be improved. It’s a partnership, with organizational and personal goals being respected and realized.

For those who think a prison’s business is that of punishment, I remind you that our own penal system is costly proof that doesn’t work. And for those who think businesses can’t afford the attention or expense to provide much beyond a paycheck for employees, I ask you to compare your results to those companies with engaged employees. You’ll think differently.